my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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