I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I got inside last night via doggy door
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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