we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
