great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
