This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize