the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
