"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Randomize
