Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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