Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize