i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
