Say something about gay babies.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
