You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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