You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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