i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
they need to just BURY HIM!
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
