Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
You can't just leave with hair like that
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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