Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
