YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize