so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
