$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
