Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
