i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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