when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
