He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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