the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Can I color on your dick again?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
