K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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