if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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