Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
