you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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