I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize