I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
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