Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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