I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
