The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
