Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
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