It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
