tell your sister to shave her snatch
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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