You're completely useless in the revolution.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
