Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
