Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
