North Korea, Best Korea!
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
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