Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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