And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Randomize
