Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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