Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
