i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
