I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
