Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
