need another drink. this is the easiest way
Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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