my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I just googled if crying burns calories
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
