so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
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