We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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